;;;;;;;

you drank a half a botle of eraly times

and she slammed your hand in the basement door
you said you never felt pain that bad before

got to drunk, told her to dump her boyfriend and date me instead
oops hes one of my best friend, probably shouldnt get that drunk again

hhhhh

mnarratives about different settings
cookout
home robbies house
grocery store
construction site
bar

spund effects and voice samples rotating thru mix
combine and switch styles rapidly and humorousaly

horror show

(E G C A)

all the pictures of the family face down a drawer

speaks to no one, doesnt have the heart for it anymore

and he goes to the store and yells about the rise in prices

forever shackled by his pain and his vices

(C A E G )

its not fair

thats the smartest man i ever met

and he sits alone drunk with the mistakes he cant forgot

he says theres nothing harder to find than a friend

oh what he could have been

all the good is hidden deep beneath

all they know is all he causes them is greif

he doesnt wanna be a monster but he is just the same

in his mind a terrible buzzing stain that wont go away

domestix

daddys yellin cuz the babys cryin

but the babys cryin cuz daddys yellin

he cant see the humor in it all

he cant see the treasures hidden in the hardest fall

mamas bones are creaking so shes sleepin

she'll spend the whole weekend angry and screamin

and shes unhappy because lher pain's exhausting

deep in denial, look what its costing her

and she cares of nothing outside the front door

its the end of the world when theres a towel on the floor

cuz it keeps her mind off the coldest realties

she buys some paint and knick knacks, domestic masterpiece

soon the kids will be grown

and the past will be unkown

because they never record anything

cuz theyre hanging from a noose like a wedding ring

jdfjkdfjkdfk

E C D

said my dad drives a bmw

he said mine steals monte carlos

he said i gotta go steal some bottles

so that i can eat tomorrow

C E D

he said i dont wanna be a thief

but ive lost it all beyond belief

and everyone i used to know

now has no more love to show

and all my pains seen as deciet

and im stumbling off my feet..off into defeat

with nothing gusding me

E D C

you can't go home

lifes taken everyhing that i needed

and so now i ake what i dont think they really need

and i dont feel that bad

cuz they dont give a damn about me

i went to a party and everybody left

that kid hates me cuz i stole his sisters checks

he says i hate to be seen as such a bad kid

im gonna join the carnival like my dad did

cjhchfgbhjfgb

(written late 2008 or early 2009)

we're all clutched to our crutch

plunging forward yet struck

we reach contentment only through our assumptions

always purging what won't fit down this narrow path we've paved

sacrifice our better senses to feel safe

hate myself sometimes for so often playing along.

chasing after the ends of the threads and ending up tangled in questions.

should i be feeling resentment? should i be thankful?

days:a daze,an array of mazes and races.

the oblivious pride themselves in their rankings & places.

stretching out the trivial to satisfy their hunger

eyes unable read between the lines;the bigger picture,trapped within their shudders

an ongoing,unending chase,a world with no time to wonder.

no time,no time.

fvfhbvghv

ouf of fear they woukdnt understand

you turned yourself into a different pman

saw the holes in their thinking and switched sides

they all just laughed and rolled their eyes

you went with the first guy who'd accept you

took the easy way out and its wrecked you

have withdrawals and throw up at work

fall for another sweet talking jerk

your parents are addicts and you are too

once he died you didnt know what else to do

now youre a trainwreck who everyone writes off

the red of the bowl lets you see since they cut the lights off

someone got too close, you got scared anhd ran

swore youd never fall victim to a man

but you just seem that empowered to me

scoffind at everything you see

dont hide your light away

dont let it go to waste

dont worry what theyll say

dont grieve for yesterday

lets take that jean jacket and throw it in the fire

make whatever changes needed to get you inspired

let's pull him back oit you and celebrate his return

because that pain could make you fly instead of burn

metal ghost

my heaven and hell are the same

they switch back and forth a thousand times a day

discover undo rediscover undo in the ice cold cement

she says i need to make my bed since im not paying rent

a whole world that i can't show anyone

a whole world that thinks that i'm not anyone

but i am, but iam

when your favoritre songs dont touch you

and the only ones who love you seem so tragically flawed

don't they all, don't they all

i've seen everything from every angle

my life's been reduced to a third-rate tale

i heard back in school

the enlightened one doomed to be seen as a fool

and when you're stuck out at the gate

envy quickly turns to hate

and everyone will seem

the victims of a shallow dream

stuck in a rough draft, a terminal lab

where you're always on empty no matter how much you have

he traded black tar fro black oil paint

he's memorizing the words of some other default saint

if you see what could be, you'll be paralyzed by what is

if you see everything, you can't be sure of anything

i was standing outside of the world, staring at all the ugly machnies

i was screaming up at the sky, knowing damned well no one was gonna intervene

if you were to face what i'm fighting, for even a second, you would hate yourself for all the grief you've given me

ELW

you havent eaten in at least a week

and i can smell the three bottles of wine on your breath when you speak

but i dont wanna speak cause you just make me sad

cuz you dont measure up to everything i had

you're not ugly and you're not stupid deither

it's just that if you're lost for long enough you become a believer

you're mother's distant, your dad's a drunk, you are both

you're always acting, i bet you'd lie under oath

you talk and you dont recognize yourself, its out of your control

you're under blood red sky tryin g to satsify the hole

that guides yoou and tries take you for all your worth

we belong together, we were doomed from birth

you watch your friends disappear one by one

you spent three hours drunk looking at your fathers gun

you makle the same mistakes, get the same results, and are still somehow stunned

i pray youll get over it and say"i was so stupid when i was young"

but thats just justification

i know there's no solution to your condition

and ill stop talking to you again

when you're most in need of a friend

in four months ill be drunk and call you up

and you'll desperate and ill be good enough

i know it's wrong to treat someone like this

but my head is on fire and i need someone to kiss

and i thought you were in the same boat,

pouring another half liter down your throat

if we're doomed let's be doomed together

at least until i get sick of you again

:O

let's take a page out of everyone's book and write a new one

let's realize everyone has it right and wrong in equal measure

he's both a victim and an offender

there's virtue in everything, persistence and surrender

you were stupid but at least you were you

i see new pictures, see what you've reduced yourself to

but when you were seventeen you had so much potential

maybe it's inevitable

or maybe i've just been away for too long

maybe i've just been away...

but if you never know the worst, you can never know the best

you'll never be really something if you've never been a mess

finally the hell has all come to a rest

a feeling anything could happen burning in my chest